How Will You Give Something Beautiful?

I'm always thankful for the mornings that I allow myself to be still enough to write.  So often it is almost as if someone else is writing for me and then the words that end up on the page are meant just for me to read.  This is why I love my journal so much.  For example, yesterday I wrote something to myself right as I was waking up and having coffee.  I reread it today and honestly, I don't really even remember writing much of it but it is just what I needed to read.  It is one of those pieces that is very private...something I probably wouldn't share with many but I'm so glad it is there for me.  A beautiful message just for me from me.  

This morning has been one of those quiet mornings where things have just fallen into place in a way that I found myself sitting down at my desk with my coffee and journal.  I started making a list of goals or things that I want to live by in order to be my best self.  When I was finished with my writing, I looked up and saw a little notebook that I've had for awhile.  On the notebooks are the words : 

"How will you give something beautiful to the world?"  

I think the biggest way we can give something beautiful to the world is by BEING US.  By telling our story as it comes.  By being REAL, talking to ourselves as we go, valuing what we have to give and most importantly, SHARING ourselves with the world or just with those we love the most.  We all have something to give.  Something beautiful.  Our Story is unique and wonderful.  

Some of my Life Goals from today:

• Listen to your inner voice. She's wiser than you know.

• Stop putting limits on yourself.  Things aren't as HARD as they seem.  All it takes is Believing.  The first step starts it all...TAKE IT!

• Enjoy the process.  Life is too short not to.

• Continue to LOVE and be vulnerable by sharing yourself.  When you give YOU, others feel a freedom to give THEM.

• Tell your story as it comes and has been but don't stop believing in your role in WRITING YOUR STORY as you want it to be.  

• Learn from mistakes, awkward moments, heartache, and the times you fall.  These things are part of what makes us who we are.  They add layers to our wisdom. 

• Surround yourself with positive people that uplift, support, and love you and others.  The REAL DEAL kind of people.  

• Don't be afraid to be REAL...even if it feels scary at times.  You are where you are and chances are that you're not alone.  

• Keep dreaming and setting new goals...this is what keeps us feeling ALIVE.

• Support others with love, encouragement and validation.  

Happy Wednesday!  What are some of your Life Goals to live by?  

Amanda 

Ramble Run 12k Run and Where I'm at with Running and Fitness

Mother's Day weekend is off to a great start!  And I must say...I LOVE this running for fun gig!  I'm so happy not to be training for something specific right now.  Running for the pure joy of running is just what I need right now in this season of my life.  And that's just it, it's a season.  It won't be long before I'll be craving another goal race and I'll be printing off my training plans, visualizing goals, being conscious of bedtimes and race nutrition, etc.  Until then, bring on the fun running.  And it has been just that.  Fun.  Wonderful.  Freeing.  My focus has shifted from tempos, marathon pace runs, and endurance work to...
whatever
my
body and spirit
tell me that I
need.

I don't really log my mileage when I'm not training but if I really think about it, I'd say I've run a total of 50 miles since Boston.  Not per week.  Total.  How many weeks has that been?  Four?  Well, I took the first 2 weeks off completely and then I've worked my way back into running very very slowly.  My longest run has been a 10 miler just a few days ago but I'm mostly running between 4 to 6ish miles when I run.  I've been spending my time focusing on:

• Seeing a Chiropractor to get some things figured out with my spine/hips/feet
• Going to a Physical Therapist to strengthen my hips, glutes and get this quad healed up.  
• Running slow and easy (no speed)
• Strength...nothing too focused but definitely hip and glute work in addition to push ups, pull ups (I'm up to about 5 or 6 again...hope to do 8 to 10 by end of summer...10 proper pull ups), lunges, squats, dips, etc. etc.  
• Loving my body with where its at. I think women get better at this with age perhaps. I'm definitely up in weight compared to a year ago but I'm really embracing my fuller legs/buns that come with more hills and strength.  My jeans are tighter in the legs but I feel STRONG.  And my husband likes the extra curves so I'm hoping that some of that stays on as I increase mileage.  Unfortunately, the boobs are the FIRST to go as I increase my fitness level.  Oh well, I've come to find myself really embracing the small boobs these days too.  It goes with the whole package...strong, lean, fit, and flat.  Ha!  
• Being positive with myself and being open to trying new things....Like my first Trail Race next weekend.  I'm in no condition to seriously race a 30k trail race but I'm going to have fun and be prepared to run strong and happy and slow...oh, and I'll fully prepared to die!  Ha!  It's called the Cradle to the Grave 30k.  Excited!  It looks beautiful.  And I'll be able to wear my new Brooks PureGrit2s!  
• Running Hills.  I have no choice if I'm going to run outside in Asheville, NC. So much hillier than where I came from.  And I don't mind...I think these hills are going to help so much.  Beats the Treadmill (which I haven't trained on in what feels like FOREVER).  

Today was my first fun Asheville race.  My husband and I ran the Ramble Run 12k together.  Oh what a course!  Holy Hills.  Glad we weren't out to race race.  Considering my lack of training right now, I would have killed myself on those hills instead of have had fun on them like I did today!  

What a beautiful run!  Not only did I get to run with my best friend, but we had fun doing it.  The race offered free child care through the YMCA and then we picked the kids up to run their Kid Run.  So, the whole family raced.

I was pleasantly surprised to win 1st place in my AG.  I'll take it.  Glad most of the people ran the 5k.  I'm perfectly happy with a 7:48 average on a very hilly 12k course considering we were running close to 9:45 pace on those up hills.  It felt great to finish with a smile and talk a bit with my husband during the race.  Such a different feeling to run for fun as opposed to a time goal.  Gosh, I've missed running with him!

I raced in my Brooks PureCadence2s and my Brooks D'lite Micro Mesh Racerback Tank.  It has become my favorite tank to race in.  Super thin and light.  Perfect for warm weather when you don't want to just wear a sports bra.

Then I came home to find a box of more Mother's Day love!  My new pair of Brooks PureGrits2 and PureFlows for my 8 year old daughter.  Love sharing what I love with my kids.

It's a good day!  Happy Mother's Day Mamas!

Amanda 

On Conquering Fears. Lessons from Trail Running.

“Do one thing every day that scares you.” 

--Eleanor Roosevelt

I'm not quite sure why the formatting on this post is so goofy.  Really annoying but no time to figure it out so embrace the goofy (different spacing, size, font...):  

I've heard it said that one should try something that scares you every day.  This is supposed to help us live more fully?  Face our fears?  Feel liberated?  Not hold ourselves back?  Break free from monotony.  Honestly, my first reaction to this statement has always been that I'm not sure that every day brings with it something scary to try. But the older I get, the more I see things differently. I think if we look, there are little things everywhere in our day that we might avoid because they scare us in some way.   I suppose it doesn't have to be a BIG thing.  Or even something that would be defined as SCARY in the traditional sense. Maybe it is a simple as talking to a stranger or inviting someone new to dinner.  Or running in a new place.  Trying a foreign food.  Talking to your kids about a topic that you've been avoiding.  Taking on a new challenge.  It makes me think that it would be a fun challenge or writing project to live a year or a few months at a time where I'm conscious and active about doing one thing every day that scares me.  I imagine this would serve as a great personal growth opportunity.  If anything, it would make my days quite interesting and make for some good writing material.  Hmmm, maybe I'll try that one of these days...A Year of Facing Fear Every Day.

I have plenty of fear surrounding me lately.  Trust me.  This move across the country, as exciting as it is, has been one big adventure of facing fears and living in new ways.  Sometimes the fear seems a little too much for me...almost stifling.  But with each new fear that I conquer with this move (or really just this move itself), I find more freedom.  As with any big change, it takes time to find my ground.  My feet are a tad wobbly as I get settled.  I'm trying to keep all my plates spinning during a time that I feel like I'm spinning myself.  So far so good.  We are thriving, kids are happy, there's so much that we love here, we're making friends and so much more.  Everything around us is NEW.  And this can be a bit scary.

One new thing for us recently is having all three kids in school for a longer stretch of time.  This means that I have up to four hours to myself on some days.  My husband and I have decided that on one of these days we will take an hour or so to go on a trail run lunch date.  Running together (especially on trails) is our favorite date so this is really exciting for both of us.

Yesterday's first trail run date proved to be just as much a lesson in conquering fear as it was a moment of embracing beauty and love.  I'm almost embarrassed to even tell this story because of how small it seems to anyone looking in but it was actually a big deal to me yesterday for some reason.  At one point in the run, we came to a wide stream. Wide is all relative.  There was no way of crossing it unless we wanted to walk through deep water.  Since we were at the start of our run, we didn't want sopping wet feet. I know, such a small thing to worry about when on a trail run.  Ha! But I had many other errands to make and no change of shoes. Our options were to find another way around or go back another way (much less beautiful).  My husband found a place through some trees where the stream was much easier to leap across. In fact, most of you would laugh that I was even scared of it. Something so easy seemed like such a leap to me at the time.  But I was SCARED.  Like little girl-like scared.  On a different day, I might have not even have thought twice about this jump. In fact, today I'd look at it and laugh myself.  But I stood there for a good 5 to 10 minutes trying to muster up enough courage to just jump.  I felt so much fear over this silly jump.  It seemed to parallel so much of what I've been feeling about life on some days lately.  It just seemed too much for me even though it was obvious that the leap wasn't beyond my capabilities.  I finally demanded that we turn around and go back.  I cried like a little baby at my annoyance over my husband trying to get me to do something I didn't want to do and made some excuse about life being scary enough right now.

My husband, my best friend, has always been there for me.  He knows when to push me and encourage me.  He knows when to wrap me up and let me be.  He knows me.  We are good for each other in that we challenge each other to keep being the best we can be.  We're there to support, push, and catch the other if they fall.  Some days he would just let this go.  But yesterday he didn't.  He was gently persistent about me making this leap.  Maybe it was just that he desperately wanted this trail run that he took his lunch break for.  But a big part of it was because he wanted to see me face this small fear and he knew that I'd feel so much better for it.  As we were running away, he stopped me and asked me to just leap on dry ground to see that I could in fact cover the distance that it would be to get over that stream.  I did just that, still annoyed at his persistence.  And then I headed back to just get it over with.  I'm not sure it was out of being irritated that he wouldn't drop it or my desire to conquer this fear and knowing the feeling that would follow it.  Probably a bit of both but I knew I NEEDED to make that jump.

As soon as I got to the place I needed to jump from, I remembered the above quote and I pushed myself to just GO.  What's the worst that would happen?  I'd fall on my ass?  I'd get wet? I mean good grief...this is what trail running is all about!  Why so much fear over this stupid little jump?  I took a deep breath and let go.  I stopped letting that fear control me.  I took the leap.  With it came a huge feeling of freedom and relief.  It was so much more than a jump over a itty bitty stream (that felt HUGE).  It was an exercise for me.  It was a metaphor of facing life fears and realizing that fear is a liar...I mean most the things we are scared of really aren't even deserving of the energy it takes to worry.  Fear holds us back from so much.

Even if we only got four miles of actually running in before having to head back, the drive there was worth every moment of time.  The greatest gift of the run besides the beauty and time with my husband was that LEAP.  Or little jump.  Ha! It was a "Life Reinforcement"...it made me stronger.  And I'm certain that it will carry over to many other things in my life.

Freedom

What a gift that running is.  It is one of the greatest teachers in life and I'm so thankful for the lessons I've learned on the run.  Here's to facing fears!

Amanda