Marathon Training. 12 weeks to go. My typical Tuesday would involve me lacing up my Brooks Launches or Pure Flows, pulling on some running tights, slapping on a stinky hat to cover my so-not-meant-for-public face, dropping off my preschooler at 9:00, fitting in a good workout of up to 10 miles at max before jumping in the car and heading to pick my kinder up at 10:30. Then home to shower, feed her something, and make it back out the door to pick up my preschooler by 11:30. Fitting in marathon training as a busy mom who also wants to be "ON" in the mom department, means MULTI TASKING and being EFFICIENT. I can't miss a beat or my windows of opportunity are gone. But sometimes those days come (like today) when it takes just as much drive and good sense to let a workout go and allow myself to just "BE STILL". Just as I rarely regret a workout and making myself get out there and get it done, I also know when my body and spirit are needing some down time and I won't regret giving myself that either. It takes strength to give ourselves this calm time and skip a run when we need to. It is a definite art in knowing ourselves as athletes...individuals...and meeting our own needs. There is a time to be driven and "ON, ON, ON", nailing every agenda and feeling like we are ahead of the game and a time to just wrap ourselves up in a warm blanket of "just being" without having to do anything at all. This is equally as important to a good training cycle as meeting every single workout on the plan just because it is written down.
So, yes, I'm off today. I have my jazzy holiday music on, the heat turned up, my favorite coffee mug filled with hot coffee, and snuggled up in quiet. I'm not answering the phone or returning text messages for a bit and I'm letting everything go except my time with ME. Lots to process for me after such a rich girl trip this weekend. A trip that was impulsively planned and one I needed greatly. I went to see a very dear friend who I actually met through this blog in 2010 but grew to know on an entirely different level in a very short time. She has now grown to be one of my best friends. Almost more like family really. Someone I consider to be a life gift. In returning from my weekend of being just with her, I'm feeling a little sad, a lot FULL in a soul sense, and just quietly contemplative about life, friendship, goals, etc. It is surely a time to Be Still for me.
In my Stillness, which often (for me) means writing, I might just break out the bullets here since I have to pick my daughter up in fifteen minutes.
- My time in Minneapolis was LOVELY. Girl time with no agenda. Sushi, nice hotel, snow!, running through the city and around the lakes, good beer, sharing my deepest thoughts, and just feeling loved and loving back.
- Marathon training is going good. Steady. Conservative. But I'm glad for the low key so far. Easy pace is getting faster but still easy. :) Love that! Seeing lots of 7:45's creep in there (and feel comfortably easy) but still trying to keep it all around 8-8:20. I have plenty of time.
- The big goal for this week is to have a recovery week of sorts with the 18 miler this weekend being my key workout.
- No big goals right now really. My biggest goal is just to keep on running and feeling good. It is the process for me this time. Not so much what will come with a marathon time at the end. I honestly can say right now that I'm not focused on a number goal.
- I'm starting to really get scared about moving to NC. Just so much ambiguity. I know I will feel much more brave when I can start finding rentals and seeing everything fall into place. My husband keeps convincing and reminding me that this will be a good change. I know I'll make friends find ways to get involved. Change is scary sometimes! We are such creatures of habit.
- Thankful. For so much. Especially inner strength and the voice of reason that comes to me when I need it most. Thankful for safe friends who let us crumble and are there to help us up.
- ICE CREAM Memory. So, a friend shared a very special memory from her childhood with me about how her parents surprised her and her siblings one night with a surprise trip to ice cream. This memory stuck with her always because of how they grew up poor and didn't get to do that sort of thing. I am always thinking about special things to do for and with my kids to make special memories. I realized that they rarely get to just go to ice cream. We just aren't a "go to ice cream" family. So last night I told them to get their jammies on and get ready for bed. Then I very seriously told them that they needed to get their shoes on because we were going to ice cream. Ha! So much better than Disneyland (no joke)...they were jumping and screaming and so beyond excited just to be doing something that they rarely get to do. My oldest daughter kept thinking that she was dreaming. Ha! So funny to me because I never really think that something this simple can be so big to them! I'm so used to saying no to things...especially things that involve eating junk. I even let them get the big sprinkle cones that I would usually say NO to...just to say no. It was truly a magical memory being made. And it made me glad that we don't do that sort of thing all the time. So simple but so special to them because of how rare we do it. To think we could have saved that money we spent at Disneyland and just went to ice cream! Last night will truly go down as one of our favorite family moments and it was so so simple and inexpensive.
Some random pictures from this weekend:
|My firs time in the Minneapolis skyways...The whole downtown is connected by these skywalks. Whatever you call them...I thought they were pretty cool! Although it was more fun walking outside in the cold and snow. LOVE.|
|LOVE HER! So much joy and laughter here. We may or may not have been on the hotel hallway floor. Hmmm.|
|Oh look, I can blow on the windows and write! Doesn't always get cold enough in Portland for this.|
|Jenn pretending she can use a map effectively! Ha! I suppose I was no better though since I tried to get us lost in a blizzard on Saturday night.|
|Beautiful Jenn. Love.|
|Not the best pic of me but this was one of the only running shots we got. 9 slow miles through the city at night. We were dressed almost identical in our Brooks gear (unplanned)...all the way down to the red Brooks Launches.|
|And this one? Not sure what it was all about. But I do remember laughing.|
Thankful for this time to be still and process my thoughts. Glad to know myself enough to know when I need the downtime that is unscheduled. Glad that I can give myself this time....freely. Such a full heart today. Happy. Content. A little raw here as I am climbing out of some sensitive months but so glad for today and new beginnings on the horizon. And especially thankful for FRIENDSHIPS that have become family to me along the way.