Assumptions About the SAHM, Balance, and Making the Most of Our Lots In Life

It is one of those rare moments that I wake up earlier than the kids and I have a few stolen minutes to myself before I'm needed by three little ones and my time is a wooosh of putting out fights, wiping up messes, answering what seems like thirty people at once, wagging my finger with a growl on my face as I try to talk to someone important on the phone and keep my kids at bay, giving kisses, playing little people, racing cars, pretending to be a princess, always making more snacks, getting drinks, cleaning up paint, crawling around like a horse, trying to get three kids focused, dressed, and ready for school, gymnastics, or doctor appointments and an endless list of other things that make me happy.  I also have those breaks where I get to steal away for a few minutes at a time to check my e-mail, read a snip of something funny or enriching...you know, connect with other ADULTS...even if it is on the computer and not the once visited staff room or teacher meeting after school.  Sometimes I even have a moment to make a phone call to a friend...preferably a friend with kids so that they understand the sound of seeming chaos in the background.  I love my life.  I love that I chose to make my present career to be at home with my kids.  I'm putting my Masters Degree to good use I'd say.  And what I love most is that I CAN do this.  I know it isn't something that everyone wants or can do but I'm thankful for it and I'm treating it like anything in my life and making the most of it!  I know that I'll have years ahead of me to go back to school.  Get that Doctorate and teach at a University if I want.  Write my book.  Go back to teaching. You know, become the President or marry a prince.  But for now, I am here.  I'm a Mom.  Day in and day out.  And I love it.  But that doesn't mean it is a cake walk.  It doesn't mean that I'm just kicking up my feet all day and eating cheese sticks and watching Dora eat cocoa beans off the trees in the rain forest and telling Swiper to Stop Swiping!  

I guess one of the things that I've been ULTRA sensitive to lately is the small comments or conversations I hear about how nice it must be to Stay At Home and Not Work!  Not just the comments that mention how lucky I am or how wonderful it must be because it IS wonderful and do consider myself lucky and these are such good intended comments.   I've received so much love and good support about my decision to be home with my kids.  My close friends and family know how important my teaching career was to me and they know how passionate and in love with learning and being active in the education field is to me.  It is my good friends and family that know that it was NOT an easy decision to give up something that made me SO INCREDIBLY Happy and ALIVE! The comments or suggestions that seem to be getting under my skin lately are the ones that make the job as a SAHM seem "cute" or "small" or ....wait for it....."EASY".

I mean really, doesn't SAHM mean:
*  staying in your jammies all day 
*  Every day is like a weekend or day off (um, not when you do it every day!)
*  drinking coffee and reading blogs (um, coffee, yes!  Necessary!  Blogs, only on the fly and with little kids tugging at my leg and blocks flying overhead.)
*  Going to thy gym and dropping kids off a daycare (what?!  Not yet...Jillian on the living room floor maybe.  But with a kid or two on my back and under my stomach when I'm doing push ups).
*  Letting my kids watch t.v all day while I read or talk to friends.  (um, again no.  Don't get me wrong, I have my uses for t.v but it usually waits until quiet time in the afternoon and some days they don't get any.  I'm kind of hardcore about the screen time.)
*  Sit on Facebook and e-mail and write blogs all day!  Surely this must be what you SAHM do all day because when we working people get home from work, we see so many postings from you on FB.  (yeah.  Well, you have a staff room and adults to engage with people!  Thank GOD for social networks or I think I'd lose my friggin' mind!  And Yes, I do take a moment here and there for e-mail, blogs, and facebook...it keeps me sane.  Helps me stay connected and involved and for Goodness Sake, I get to use my MIND!!  But as always, I have goals in life, and one of them is to spend way less time getting sucked into the computer)   
*  You get the gist....we basically sing songs, play with play dough, eat snacks, and have one big long vacation (okay, so the majority of you don't think this but there are a few that do)

I think we all can find things with our life and our jobs that are hard.  Things that make us feel over the top with stress.  We can all feel out of control and lost sometimes.  But it is so important to not get trapped in that "Grass is Always Greener" mindset.  Life is about finding Balance.

Life as a SAHM is about Balance (as with any job) and putting intention and focus into being with my kids, creating a magical childhood for them, making my living/working environment work for me (this means trying to keep it clean and organized...I mean, I'm here a lot!),  and making sure I take time to nurture and support MYSELF!  Right now this means setting and accomplishing personal goals, connecting socially and intellectually with other adults, and continuing to reflect, write, read and set goals for my personal life and career life after motherhood.  Part of this for me is writing my blog, staying connected with friends and family on facebook and e-mail and taking time to get away.  This is the public side that people see and perhaps why some people assume that being a SAHM is so easy and why we SAHMs can't possibly understand how difficult it is to work outside the home and still juggle family life, etc.

I guess my purpose in writing this is just to touch on the issue of accepting our lots in life, our jobs, our situations and making the most of them without assuming that we have it better or harder than others.  It isn't about what job is better or harder to balance or who has more on their plate.  I mean really, it is about balancing the life we do have and making the most out of our situations.  We all have busy lives and bumps to work through.

Wooooo weeee, looks like I had something to get off my chest (as little as my chest is, it sure did have a lot there)!    Thankful that I have this blog to vent!

Things I'm thankful for today:
*  I had a graston technique therapy session with my Sports Chiropractor yesterday and am feeling better.  Thinking that my problems had a lot to do with the Kinvara Shoes that I was trying to run in.  I over pronate so I'm thinking I'm good to stick with some more supportive shoes. Still taking it easy on the running front...this is important to me...I don't want to be stupid.
*  My purchases from Portland Running Company ( next blog)
*  My kids sleeping in late so that i had time to write and reflect.
*  It's Friday
*  I love my job!
*  I've got a beach house all picked out for my marathon weekend and will get to stay 3 nights with some of our best friends!

*  Most importantly, today I'm thankful for supportive and understanding people that make the most of their life and support and encourage others.

I'll leave you with a picture of my office at work.

1.  If you made it this far through this blog you either A.  Are one of those few people that really read it all  or B. Scrolled down to see what questions I might ask in hopes that they are easy to answer without being obvious that you didn't read the blog.  Ha, I get this!


2.  Balance.  What's an area of your life that you would like to give more attention to in order to live a more balanced life?  


3.  When you start feeling out of control with your life, what are things you do to find balance and peace?  


Happy Friday!  I'll be back next time with a shorter and more interesting post...I promise!  Probably about Running Shoes and Bras...Exciting!
Amanda