Twenty-nine year old Me against 20 month old Her.
She had my number.
And we both knew it.
She looked me in the eyes and deliberately and willfully threw a glass vase down to the ground to shatter into millions of pieces. Non-reactive parenting? What was that?! Because at that moment, she had me reacting all over the place. Screaming and yelling and acting like...well, the two year old. She certainly wasn't celebrating her win. Instead, she looked rather scared shitless. We were both an emotional mess. My husband stepped in and sent me to my room to BREATHE and count to 500. It was at that moment that I was seeing myself react just the way I knew I DID NOT want to be as a parent, that I knew I needed to have a plan so that it wouldn't happen again. I was going to be in control of this parenting thing!
Here's the book I bought that night:
From the small amounts of the book that I've read, it really is an excellent book! I just pulled it off my shelf a few minutes ago and after a thumb through, I'm going to finish reading it. I even found the notes that I had started taking while reading it. I love rereading my notes because I end up learning all over again! Great reminders:
- Calm my own anxiety, refusing to transfer it over to my children and make the situation worse. (Gosh, I really needed to reread this one!)
- In order to be in charge, I need to bring myself under control!
- Emotional Reactivity doesn't just make things worse; it actually helps produce the very results we're reacting against.
- My goals: really notice and comment on the good good things they are doing and Tap deep for my reservoir of calm.
I'm really glad I found this book again and that I kept some of my notes in the book! Hoping to pick it back up again over the next few weeks!
Stacks and Stacks of Books
If any of you are like me, you might have a long list, or in my case, a big stack of books that you are "READING". Really this means that I've started them all but not getting finished with any of them. One of my new goals is to really make time for finishing some of the books I've been dappling in or thumbing through with a non-committal agenda. Especially my parenting book! Don't get me wrong, sometimes it is fun to have books just scattered around to pick up when the moment strikes me. Reading small snippets here and there...little nuggets of wisdom to think about throughout the day. This works well with non-fiction.
Here are just some of the books you might find by my bedside or in a stack by the couch right now:
|Flow in Sports is one that Meg from Meg Runs highly recommended. So I ordered it. Grace Based Parenting...Loving it!!|
|This one was sent to me in the mail as a "just because" gift from a blog friend. Love it!|
|A book I saw in a friend's bathroom and said it sounded interesting. She loaned it to me. Thanks Cathy!|
|I hear great things about this and as an educator and mother of a boy, this one is definitely one I will get to!|
Now, as I finish icing my calf, I'm off to pick up one of these and stick with it! With the help of my foam roller, compression socks, good stretching, and a go get 'em attitude, my calf served me well this morning. I felt strong on my treadmill workout...short and sweet. And this gym childcare?! Score! My kids love it, I love it, AND I don't have to wait until 7 p.m to get my run on!
What is on your reading list? Or what books are in your "reading stack"? Please share! I love to know this kind of thing. I might be adding some of your books to my list or stack!